Wednesday, June 20, 2007

The Relative Resilience of Fishnet vs. Denim

Lovely. I now have matching dinged-up knees. On Friday, while wearing perfectly normal ballet flats, I slipped on the (level, dry) sidewalk, scraping my left knee and the top of my left foot and landing thuddily on my right ass cheek. Amazingly, my fishnets remained intact, even though the skin under them suffered bruising and scratches.

Contrast this incident to one that happened a few months earlier. I tripped on a crack in the sidewalk, fell forward onto my knees, and majorly tore up both my right knee and my jeans. At the time I was returning from doing some grocery shopping and had a backpack full of juice bottles; I was just glad that I didn't fall on it and wind up with broken glass and juice everywhere. Unfortunately, in trying to prevent that from happening, I did sort of catch the backpack with my head...but, hey, I already get chronic headaches, so what's a little more head trauma?

These two incidents have led me to formulate several significant conclusions:
1) I should really walk a few steps in front of Afshin so he has a better chance of catching me.
2) My life is possibly some sort of great cosmic joke, in which I am now getting the scraped knees I should have suffered as a child had I ever been allowed outdoors. (Seriously. My mom yelled at me the only time I ever attempted to climb a tree.)
3) Danskin fishnets are totally the way to go.

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