Nocturnal Injuries

Last night I woke up (as I often do) because I needed to use the bathroom. This is not unusual, as I drink lots of water and apparently have the world's smallest bladder. Upon waking, I lifted my head off the pillow—and bonked into Afshin's elbow. (It was totally encroaching on my side of the bed.) I rose, carefully picked my way across the bed, narrowly avoiding Afshin's feet and legs...and slammed my knee into the coffee table, waking Afshin in the process. Amazingly, I have but a single tiny bruise on my right knee. And Afshin has no recollection of the incident. But that's not unusual, as, after he's asleep, he's dead to the world until morning. So I apparently need not only a sleep helmet, but sleep kneepads as well.